A Glass Act — On the matter of Malbec and motivation amidst midterms

Midterms approach with the inevitability of winter and the subtlety of a freight train. What this requires is not motivation (motivation has abandoned ship) but rather a wine substantial enough to justify the 20 minutes you’re not spending on flashcards.

Tapiz Alta Collection Malbec 2019. Mendoza, Argentina, Uco Valley. $20 at Total Wine & More, which represents a significant financial commitment for two undergraduates but a defensible one when the wine justifies the expense. 14% alcohol by volume. Estate-grown and bottled, aged in French oak, and packaged in a bottle that looks like it belongs on the table at a dinner party where people use cloth napkins. The label features a gold “94” medallion, which presumably indicates someone important approved of this, though the specifics remain deliberately vague.

Look: Deep ruby, nearly opaque. Dark enough to appear serious without crossing into we’re-trying-too-hard territory. This is a wine that looks like it cost $20 dollars, which it did.

Nose: Dark cherry and blueberry, chocolate underneath. Rich, aromatic, the kind of smell that makes you understand why people spend money on wine instead of beer. No flaws to explain away.

Taste: Ripe dark fruit—cherry, blueberry—full-bodied and smooth. Tannins are present but polished, smooth enough to make velvet jealous. This is a wine that asks how your mother’s been and actually cares about the answer. Spice from the oak shows up without dominating.

Finish: Long enough to be memorable, short enough to avoid melodrama. Dark fruit and spice linger without requiring commentary. Clean exit.

Serve it right: Room temperature, or whatever temperature your residence hall considers room temperature this week. Breathing time helps but isn’t mandatory—this wine is forgiving of impatience, which makes it better company than we are.

Pairings: Conversations of the highest order—unpacking your friend’s dubious plan to retire via multi-level marketing, debating whether Pluto deserves reinstatement, or insisting your major is “actually difficult.” Best alongside a medium-rare steak, a suspiciously artisanal pizza, or a block of sharp cheddar that required a second mortgage.

Verdict: A serious wine at a price point that remains within the realm of student-budget possibility, assuming deferred student loan payments or a willingness to skip lunch twice. Smooth, balanced, rich—the kind of Malbec that makes Argentina’s reputation for this varietal seem less like marketing and more like geography. A defensible use of $20.

Rating: 9/10. Costs more than we usually spend, tastes like it should cost more than it does. We opened this on a Tuesday night for no particular reason, which seemed excessive until we discovered St. Benedict’s Rule permits monks half a bottle of wine daily. If men who wake at 3 a.m. for vigils and own nothing still prioritized wine, who are we—with significantly fewer obligations—to second-guess them? Our sudden appreciation for sixth-century monastic wisdom is both convenient and sincere.

Sincerely,

Gabe Evenocheck & Ben Bugbee
Subcommittee on Collegiate Wine Standards

(This review assumes you are 21+. Legal counsel insists on this clarification despite our assurances that everyone reads disclaimers carefully.)