Can designs can’t be touched: fall themed IPAs and beers

So, you found yourself reading The Record the other day … the only newspaper with editors willing to print our deeply insightful reviews on beers, seltzers and liquors.

We are just your average consumers of alcoholic beverages with bold and controversial opinions. Please don’t consume alcoholic beverages if you are under 21 and follow the law. If you are of a legal drinking age, please drink responsibly and…stop at buzzed!

We tackled our first American Pale Ale (APA) this week, the Pseudo Sue, brought to us by the Toppling Goliath Brewing Company in Decorah, Iowa. Pseudo Sue comes in strong with a 5.8% ABV and a 45 IBU. IBU stands for international bitterness units and is used by brew enthusiasts, like ourselves, to determine how bitter a beer is. The Pseudo Sue ties Festbier—from our last week’s review—for highest alcohol content, and it is the most bitter drink we have reviewed so far – so many IBUs.

Despite being from the middle of nowhere in Iowa, this drink was quite pleasant. This pale ale utilizes the flavors from a single hop, the Citra hop. This hop creates the typical American flavor style you will find in an APA. The Citra hop creates a mild bitterness and strong citrus flavor and smell. A smooth blend of grapefruit and mango makes this pale ale stand out, and it showcases the care that goes into brewing it.

Pseudo Sue is a light-colored beer but still has the classic haziness typical in a pale ale. A haziness that you don’t want in your water, but love in your pale ale. The haziness could be compared to the various liquids squeegeed off the Sal’s dance floor after a Friday night.

One of the best parts of an IPA or APA is the can it comes in. Most have unique, intricate designs on them, often created by local artists.

Pseudo Sue did not disappoint in the can department.

Those who have spent time with Mack know he gets distracted by shiny, bright or noisy things. He couldn’t help himself when he saw the purple and green dinosaur on the Pseudo Sue can, it looks like Barney, from the beloved show Barney and Friends, took excessive amounts of testosterone and then a lot of chest days. The character could be the love child of Barney and the Hulk.

Before conducting our extensive, highly rigorous review process, we went to Total Wine and Liquor in Burnsville. Not only so we could save money but also prepare for upcoming reviews. On deck is Bud Light Seltzer Fall Flannel Variety Pack, Ranch Water–Grapefruit and a couple Voodoo Ranger IPAs. Stay tuned for those and Mariska Hargitay.

To any single Bennies, unlike the omelet bar, we won’t leave you when you need us most. If you are interested in having a lengthy conversation about alcoholic beverages and the lack of an omelet bar, well, our emails are right there. Remember, if you are of age, stop at buzzed! Anyways, back to choring.